Posts Tagged ‘teen’

Children’s Clothing: Individuality and Setting Guidelines

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Posted 26 Feb 2010 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Tidbits

Tight skinny jeans, hip hugging pants, and a tight shirt with a low neckline to boot, this doesn’t sound like the ideal outfit I’d want to see on my girls. What is going on with children’s clothing today? I understand the styles of today and agree the styles my teens and other young girls put together are very cute. Even though these outfits are cute and fashionable… I don’t want to see them on my girls or other young girls at all.

I can monitor what my children are wearing because I buy their clothes. However, when other teens and young girls are wearing what my girls wish to wear it does make my job harder. I appear to be the mean mom because I have standards for my girls. With these standards, in regards to children’s clothing, I know I have to decide which battles are worth fighting and which are not.

I set clear rules on what I expect of my children in regards to clothing, makeup, and piercings. They know I don’t want their pants being so tight that if I pinch at them I get skin as well as jean material. I don’t want to see their undergarments when they bend over in regards to low cut tops and hip hugging jeans.

Fashion and children will always be a battle for many parents. What are your limits or are you carefree and allow the kids to be individuals regardless of what items they choose to wear? What are your opinions on this matter? Are parents to lenient these days or am I just a big ole’ ninny? Please share your thoughts by commenting below.

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Teens and Trust; Can the Two Exist?

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Posted 16 Feb 2010 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Educates

My Goofballs

Watch your teens folks! My teen girls ask that I trust them, ask that I don’t intrude in their personal lives, and they speak of a word called privacy! I never heard of such a thing.

I do trust them, yes indeed, I trust that these young ladies are capable of getting into a lil’ trouble, big trouble and at times no trouble at all. I will respect their privacy if they aren’t showing me strange behavior. If you’re running around talking back, cursing, showing me boys aren’t just cute but that they mean something more then just that… then, I must stalk you! Sorry!” I’m the mom and I’m to keep you out of trouble. Deal with it!”

I found a letter titled, “I’m Pissed”. It’s not addressed to anyone and was laying out in our common living space written by my 14 year old. Do I read more, of course I do! Would I have if it was titled “Buttercups and Roses”? Probably not!

When I see a boy on your MySpace move from page 3 to your top 10 and you’re only 13, well it’s common sense my friends… It’s time to log on and see what’s really going on with my 13 year old and this new friend she is oh-so fond of that he gets to move so quickly to the spot her most important peeps are at!

Teens and trust can co-exist, but I believe it’s in a parent’s best interest to still keep an eye on their teens. I don’t write the rules, and raising teens never came with a handbook. That’s why I’m here telling it like it is! It’s so easy to get into trouble at such an impressionable and emotional age. Besides that, it’s so hard to fix the trouble once it’s dead-smack front and center! 

Many of you will agree and some of you will disagree. Some will say, “If you truly trust your teen you will give them the privacy they ask for.” I can respect that, but I chose to keep an eye on my girls the best that I can all the while still giving them some space. I do my best.

Now I must ask, do you have any teen raising tips? If so, please comment below for all of us to read. You may have an answer to what some of us just can’t grasp. Thank you friends!

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Teen Corner: What is & What isn’t

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Posted 19 Dec 2009 — by Robyn
Category Teen Corner

What is & What isn'tNowadays people are concerned with the newest fads and what’s in and what’s out. Everybody wants to be “in” or cool. Nobody wants to be the “outsider” or the not cool one.

I say it’s better to be the different one than the ‘it’ person! If you are the same as everybody else, how does that make you cool? If you act and do the same things as everyone else you aren’t really unique. I prefer to be the one people can point out in the crowd. I like to be the person anybody can obliviously find.

I say: it’s better to be the spectacle rather than the “onlooker”. Sounds a bit odd I know, but trust me, it pays off to be recognizable. If you are the person that people always pay attention to, your bound to have more true friends than “friends” that are with you because you’re the cool guy. Why? Because what happens if you stopped keeping up the newest styles and the coolest hairdos? Would those friends you had then still be there? Think about it.

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Teen Corner: Something Special

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Posted 12 Dec 2009 — by Robyn
Category Reed Tidbits, Teen Corner

Teen Corner: Something Special

Rings, what do they mean to you? When you see a person walking down the street, and they’ve numerous rings on, what’s the first thing you think? I happen to be a victim of starring, like we all have at one point or another. I have at least one ring on each finger. If I’m not wearing a ring I literally feel bare or uncomfortable. I started wearing rings when I was seven. At that point I was only wearing one. From that time on, I’ve always had this “thing” for rings. I’m 13 now and my rings and I are inseparable. I wear them every day, all the time.

I wear them because they tell a story about me. Every last one of my rings represents an event that happened in my life. Like, I have a sterling-silver band with pink gems in it. I got that ring when I was 11 and I always wear it on my married finger. Not because I want people to think I’m married, but just because that’s where it’s most comfortable. When I wear my rings I feel safe or protected in a way. I feel secure when I know that if all I’ve got is taken from me; I will always have my rings. They’re like a part of me.

Is there something that you can’t bear to part with? Please comment below.

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Parents, Discipline Your Kids Please

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Posted 04 Dec 2009 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Educates

Parents, discipline your kids please! Walking around the grocery store getting a few last minute items for dinner, who would guess that my kids are causing trouble! I don’t get it one bit. Every time I take the kids with me to the store I get them a little snack or surprise. Why do they mess up on my clock or watch… however the saying goes! They wouldn’t be doing this if dad was around (See how well behaved below).

Discipline Your Kids

Jamarae, at 10 years of age, is being chased by Sinya, the eight year old. “No surprise for you two, that’s settled.” They’re now a bit calmer. Low and behold, less then five minutes later Robyn, the 13 year old, is chasing Sinya and pushed her down on the ground. “Are you serious!? You’re almost double the lil’ one’s age! No surprise for you either!” In the check out stand I grab a small bag of chips for Yissie, the two year old. Yissie is the only one half way acting right. I have both girls on strike, playing “shut-down mode” with me.

The checkout lady says, “Boy do they look mad.” I tell her, “they were acting up, and get nothing from me today.” Who would think the two year old would be the only one to get a treat. By the time we leave the store, Jamarae is fine. The girls are still in a mood. I have to remind them the longer they carry on their attitudes it hurts me none, just means I could keep the punishment going with chores and such. The act stopped soon enough. I must say that I enjoyed the quietness while they were in shut down mode. But there is a lesson in all of this. 

Discipline your kids! The kids got nothing from me. I could’ve given in, and given them a special surprise for later. Had I done that they would’ve never learned. Kids will be kids, but we parents have to be parents.

Have your children tried your patience while out and about? What do you do when they pull a fast one?

If you enjoy hearing my ramblings and advise about my children and yours, please subscribe to our updates by clicking here. Feel free to comment below. I love hearing from yall!

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Teen Violence Experienced

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Posted 17 Nov 2009 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Tidbits

Teen violence and I met face to face the other night. I’m sitting in my car with all my children minus Sinya, Jr, and Robyn. Sinya being at a sleepover, Jr freshly dropped of at his mom’s apartment, and Robyn is inside her mom’s getting a few last minute items for her first week in a new school. Robyn has moved in with us again temporary. The kids and I are a few cars parked away from the apartment Robyn is inside of. We’ve been waiting a bit, figuring she will be stepping outside any moment now; I drive closer to the front door of her mom’s apartment. 

Low and behold, a young boy we’ve been having problems with at 16 or 17 years in age is standing by Robyn’s mom’s kitchen window with two other of his wanna-be gang-banging friends. The taller of the three pulls out what appears to be a gun from his pant’s waste line and passes it to the young boy we’re having problems with. The young boy then motions toward us with a “what’s up” motion, and looks at me like he is the devil himself. My son, Jamarae, who is only ten years old is screaming, “He has a gun,” I look again and the young boy we have problems with appeared to cock his gun back as if he is getting ready to shoot (I keep saying “appeared” because it was very dark) and I was ghost soon as I heard my son scream the word “GUN”. I sped as fast as my car would let me and was out of there. 

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As I leave the area, I’m calling Robyn’s mother again and again, no answer. I just want her to keep Robyn in the house. Finally I get through to her phone. Robyn is safe. The police are called. Robyn’s mom met us with Robyn at the train station, where I was parked waiting for the police. We are all settled now, safe and sound!

Anger has been burning through my veins all week. I’m pretty sure the boy was just trying to scare my family and I hope he had no intentions on hurting us. However, with this day and age, and the state of mind this boy has been in; who knows what’s possible at this point. I’m hurt that my son seen his life flash before his eyes. I’m thankful Robyn is here with us full time, for he is the reason she is here in the first place. Count your blessing, be cautious of your surroundings, act quickly, and remember you’re not promised tomorrow!

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Renae’s Midlife Crisis & The World Strictest Parents

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Posted 03 Nov 2009 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Tidbits

RenaeThe diva, Renae, gets bent out of shape easily these days. She is 14 and sometimes a handful! My chief complaint is her negative attitude and her mood swings. I’m blessed to say the least, I have no worry about boys (even though she is a bit boy crazy) or drugs… she knows what she wants and it’s not that!

She sits here and tells me how hard her life is. Her chief complaints: keeping grades up, being disorganized, pleasing her dad, making me happy, being grounded, having her phone taken away from her for punishment, and dealing with siblings! I understand. I take nothing from her difficult teenage years.

Her mood swings are sometimes stressful. I can deal with it, but it’s not always easy. I sometimes spend more time teaching her and scolding her then I do the other kids all week. Don’t get me wrong, we cuddle all weekend as well. She, at six feet tall, lays on me as if she is still two years old. We snuggle, rough house, and just plain goof off quite often. So the good times roll in as well as the tough ones!

Anyhow, I’m sitting back tonight watching The World Strictest Parents on MTV! Oh cool, I should send her there. This is a show where unruly teens go for a week to be parented by this family that is so-called strict, and then the teen learns lessons and goes home a bit more structured. But, nope, won’t work! She is an angel at other people’s homes. It takes months or even years to see this midlife crisis diva moment like behavior. (I call it that because she has so much emotion at age 14, I believe she will skip right over the real hard times… midlife crisis, and menopause will be nothing for her I’m sure. A breeze to say the least)!

So I guess I have to buckle up! I find myself trying to enjoy the few days I have with her (remember she lives with her dad now), and I go easy on her. Before she lived with her dad I was on top of it more so, but slacked often enough. I created her monstrous like behavior and her greatness in one way or another, through encouragement or lack of discipline. All is my fault and I get it! She will be an adult in four years, ouch! Time to buckle up and make her accountable for all things. Boy isn’t this going to be fun!

Who has teens here, any tips to make it easier? When does this phase go away? Does it get better? Please share by commenting below, thank you!

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Renae’s Saturday Day School Leads to Suspension

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Posted 27 Oct 2009 — by Jennifer
Category Reed Tidbits

Renae's Saturday School Leads to SuspensionCheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater! Yea, Renae was caught helping her friend cheat on a test at school last week. She was giving her friend the answers to a test and that breaks her schools “code of conduct”! Off to Saturday school she must go.

She was scheduled to go last Saturday, her alarm didn’t go off or she never set it! Not my fault, Renae currently resides at her father’s home during the week due to our move last December. We moved a bit out of the area, and as most of you know my drivers license has been taken from me due to medical reasons… so there you have it, she is now with her father because we want her to go to a good school!

Anyhow she is 14 and quite capable of setting an alarm and getting herself to Saturday school on time. Normally Im a big sucker and would ask her dad, “Why didn’t you check to see if she was up?” or “Why didn’t you wake her up?” I do see that she is capable so I let her learn her new found lesson, SUSPENSION!

So she is at her dad’s house, and he is sleeping… She calls me to get instruction on how to make basic breakfast potatoes. Of course she makes me stay on the phone the whole time through the peeling, cutting, cooking, and seasoning process! Are you serious? Write it down, and call me if you need me. Goodness.

Well, her potatoes are done and now she is in more trouble for leaving a mess strewn about. I guess that is best. She was having to much fun for a SUSPENSION day anyhow!

Note: Just realized it looks like she is flipping us off!!! She really isn’t I promise!

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Internet Safety for Teens

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Posted 14 Oct 2009 — by Jennifer
Category All Things Techy

Renae

Who knew National Protect Your Identity Week starts in a few days and runs from October 17-24th. My teens are grounded from the computer, one for a lack of better judgment and the other for grades. But soon as they get it right, internet safety tips will be reviewed once again.

I found a great article on teen safety in regards to internet use on idexperts’ website called “Eight Safety Tips for Teens When “Hanging Out” Online.”

Top tips for teen’s internet safety:

  • Don’t give out your id numbers – social security, driver license, identification, library card, medical id… None, dont give out any identification numbers.
  • Don’t post any personal information -your full name, school name, age, address, phone number. Not only could stalkers find, but fraud can find you this way.
  • Ban email and social networking quizzes – when you use these fun quizzes the application has rights to your personal information. Quizzes from friends are okay.
  • Don’t let people know where you are or where you are going – including non-specific places. If my age is listed as 16 and I say I’m going to my school dance. Someone can use the internet to find out which high schools in my city are having a dance. Bam! Not good.
  • Set your profile to private – this is a good one. That way nobody can see your teens’ information without their permission.
  • Use a non personal email address for social networking sites. This is key. If your account is hacked, the hacker can use your email address for many scams.
  • Secure your connections – Dont use public computers to engage in social networking, and lock your phones (be sure parents have your password).
  • “Be selective about what pictures you text or post on your page – Is it a photo you would want your parents to see? Treat your Internet activity like a digital tattoo. Once you post something, it cannot be taken back. Even if you erase the posting, there are cached versions and backups on servers across the country.”

These tips should be used by adults as well, but most of us know these tips if we are using social network sites. Any other tips or any questions please comment below.

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Huge Blowout for Halloween Costumes

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Posted 30 Sep 2009 — by Jennifer
Category Entertainment, Time & Money

Costume discounters is having a huge blowout sale click the link for more details:

Blowout prices – Up to 74% off Clearance Costumes at CostumeDiscounters.com!

Great! I know where I’ll be getting my costumes this year!

Pictures to come soon!

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